These Unhinged Shoppers Are the Reason Self-Checkout Was Invented

Laced Up for Candy Chaos

Alexis Ren squatted like candy-picking was performance art, one almond chocolate away from turning the snack aisle into a music video. Her hair tousled, her stare serious, and her pose saying she’s more into cocoa than conversation. Most people look for the price tag, but she seems like she is contemplating the meaning of nougat while the world spins in slow motion.

That glossy stare wasn’t aimed at the calories. Whatever errand this started as, it spiraled into a full-on fantasy sequence, complete with sugar, spice, and suspiciously good lighting. That outfit screams less “errands” and more “casting call.” The KitKats didn’t stand a chance.

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